I know I have been single for quite some time. To some I seem isolated and there is some minor truth to that.
However, there is another side to it. One of the reasons I have remained single and alone is the emotional freedom involved. I have always been a man that, it seems, has much stronger emotions than the average male. Never been any good at hiding them or restraining them. They may not always be evident to those who don't know me. To those few who do know me (which can take many years), the twitch of an eye can speak worlds. I have always felt my emotions like an electric current through me.
I like being alone because I can feel anything I feel and express it how I choose without guilt, remorse or retribution years later. I can rage, sing, even cry without embarrassment.
There are some who view my solitude as being a sign that I care for little. The exact opposite is true. Much of the time, I remain isolated because I become overwhelmed on many levels the more time I spend in the company of other people. I am not able to easily tolerate those who spread hatred, anger, distrust, violence and falsity.
I'm not arrogant. I will readily admit if I am wrong about something. However, it does require someone with an opposing view to prove their point more valid than my own, which is often difficult. Mostly for the time I spend in thought, meaning I frequently have spent much more time considering my opinion before reaching a conclusion.
Some people think of me as an intellectual and they consider intellectuals to be emotionally distant. Again, the opposite is true. We all learn most about things we care about. However, intellectuals frequently care about a wider range of influences. What seems like emotional distance from the outside is often considering any opinion or emotion from multiple viewpoints and considering benefits versus consequences, most often well beyond the self. For that reason, like many intellectuals, my emotional response is often delayed rather than immediate.
I guess you can compare it to running a budget before signing the sale papers on a new car as opposed to signing the papers and then learning the payments are so high you can no longer afford food. Intellectuals often believe you can enjoy the car more if you can drive it on a full stomach and can afford to put gas in it. That car is a lot less attractive when the repo man comes for it.
However, there is another side to it. One of the reasons I have remained single and alone is the emotional freedom involved. I have always been a man that, it seems, has much stronger emotions than the average male. Never been any good at hiding them or restraining them. They may not always be evident to those who don't know me. To those few who do know me (which can take many years), the twitch of an eye can speak worlds. I have always felt my emotions like an electric current through me.
I like being alone because I can feel anything I feel and express it how I choose without guilt, remorse or retribution years later. I can rage, sing, even cry without embarrassment.
There are some who view my solitude as being a sign that I care for little. The exact opposite is true. Much of the time, I remain isolated because I become overwhelmed on many levels the more time I spend in the company of other people. I am not able to easily tolerate those who spread hatred, anger, distrust, violence and falsity.
I'm not arrogant. I will readily admit if I am wrong about something. However, it does require someone with an opposing view to prove their point more valid than my own, which is often difficult. Mostly for the time I spend in thought, meaning I frequently have spent much more time considering my opinion before reaching a conclusion.
Some people think of me as an intellectual and they consider intellectuals to be emotionally distant. Again, the opposite is true. We all learn most about things we care about. However, intellectuals frequently care about a wider range of influences. What seems like emotional distance from the outside is often considering any opinion or emotion from multiple viewpoints and considering benefits versus consequences, most often well beyond the self. For that reason, like many intellectuals, my emotional response is often delayed rather than immediate.
I guess you can compare it to running a budget before signing the sale papers on a new car as opposed to signing the papers and then learning the payments are so high you can no longer afford food. Intellectuals often believe you can enjoy the car more if you can drive it on a full stomach and can afford to put gas in it. That car is a lot less attractive when the repo man comes for it.
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