Small spending spree

So, I went on a small spending spree today. Not that much. 

Got candy for Halloween. Nobody showed up. That's okay, more for me!

Got the concrete for the rocket stove mass heater. Happy for that. Been planning and trying to get to building it for about 3 years now, I think. It's not really that expensive but not cheap. I got ten bags of concrete and already had two. Will probably need more but I think this should get the base done. I already have enough cinder blocks and the metal drum. 

Did some grocery shopping, stopped for lunch. 

Got a single sugar cane stalk. Going to change my approach and plant it before winter. See if it comes up in the spring. 

I have a slow leak in a tire, so picked up a bottle of "Slime". Though I may not use it. Going to take a good look at the tires first and decide if I need new ones before winter. 

Here's a cool thing! Got a notice from my insurance company that I got a gift card for filling out a questionnaire earlier this year. Got a $75 Amazon gift card! 

Getting to bed soon and get some stuff done tomorrow. 

Sick and not

I had to take a sick day yesterday. I was nauseated, throwing up..until nothing was left. Shaky, felt like I had a fever. Plus my tell when I have an infection, chapped lips. And no appetite, had to stick to a soft and liquid diet. 

When I talked to the ex today, she said she knows several people who have had the same thing recently.

Was not at full speed today but much better. Well enough to work. 

I am finally genuinely regaining some energy. Getting back to being me! Not completely there and my weight is still down. That's to be expected when you have to rebuild yourself from the cellular level up. Of course, yesterday was a setback on that. 

Finances were thrown back slightly by having to buy another car. Not going to complain, as I had the money to do so and not actually go in debt. The problem is I still have not gotten the title. Been almost two weeks. 

I have a rather busy weekend ahead. Glad I feel up to it! Need to enclose the solarium again. Plus quite a bit more. The solarium is a priority because it's getting cool out and I need to make it warm before it gets colder. Keep it warm for the dog. 

To that end, some of it will have to wait. To build the planned stove, I need fire bricks. No home improvement places here keep them in stock, so I ordered some this evening. They are expected to arrive in about two weeks or so. Until then, I can work on other aspects of the solarium and set the base for the fireplace. Maybe even set the sides. I am expecting it to take a few weeks to complete. I should still have it done before it gets really cold this year. 

Kind of excited about that. Been considering building this for about three years now. Just had to complete other tasks before I could get to it. Got the rest of the solarium done last year. 

Masochism

I guess I must have a masochistic side. I'm watching the GOP debate.

My headache began with the announcers, who acted like some kind of teenage girls creaming their jeans over a rock star. Then came the opening announcement ,which was almost enough to make me puke.

Since then it has been lie after delusion after lie.

I have actually taken a few shots of Tuaca since this started. Seems to help. Otherwise my head would explode.

I am feeling a whole lot better. Been eating a LOT of calories. Have not weighed myself for a few days but just know I am no longer feeling like I am in continuous malnutrition. Been eating a lot of junk food. Also been rediscovering foods I used to love. Pot pies, cookies (Okay, not quite as fond as I used to be.), honey buns, doughnuts..

Need to hop on the scale and see how that looks.

Imbalance

Daughter hasn't been feeling so great this weekend. Sinus infection but not a major one. She just hasn't felt like doing much this weekend, so we've stayed home. So weird that I am 53 and feel like doing more than a 12 year old. 

She does enjoy the Mini drone I gave her as a birthday present. I got her favorite cake, red velvet. 

Been doing some minor research on political subjects. Turns out that people registered as GOP make up only 25 percent of voters. Democrats come in at 30 percent. Independents are the largest group, at 43 percent. But most Independents vote Liberal. Meaning the GOP is very likely to lose by a massive margin next year. The more young people get out and vote, the larger that margin will be. Young people tend to vote Liberal in large percentages. The biggest question is whether people will vote. Right now, I am expecting a very large voter turnout. This election cycle has people more fired up than any election in my life. I've read other people making similar statements, which is good.

Since Getting the car the other day, I had not driven it. So, today I drove daughter to her mother's. The car worked really well. It has very good acceleration. It was a little stiff at first. Guess it hasn't been driven for a while. It got easier over time. 

Guns

A increasing political and social topic is guns. There have been a horrid and increasing number of mass shootings and gun crimes for quite some time now.

Today, a 4 year old girl was shot in the head during a road rage incident here in Albuquerque. Someone in another car shot at the truck she was riding in on the highway. She died. That one made me cry.

The more that people discuss increasing gun control in this country, the more the gun nuts scream, claim their rights are being taken away. Nobody is taking their guns away. What is being proposed is increasing background checks, eliminating some things like assault weapons and large capacity magazines, maybe a psychiatric test before being allowed to buy a gun. Plus closing gun show loopholes which allow guns to be sold with no background check at all. 

I keep trying to gain an understanding of the far right wing mentality. The only way to fight them is to understand them. Ultimately, I have come to the conclusion that many are either subconscious or fully conscious sadists. No, I am not kidding. It completely fits.

Here is something I wrote this evening. I did not post this. Too long. I did post a shorter version of it, though- 

There was a time not long ago I believed certain things about Republicans. I thought they were loyal to their party. I thought they were uninformed or misinformed. 
Not any more. I'm done making excuses for them.
At this point I sincerely believe far right GOP's are just sadists. Not just sadists but sadists too cowardly to admit to being such.
Look at the evidence. Gun rights. Children being shot on a daily basis. The response? More guns, shoot more people. 
Poverty and unemployment. The response? Give more money to the rich and corporations. 
Trickle down theory? It has had a 35 year run and just gave our country away. Now the top 10 percent possess 90 percent of US wealth. At what point do you think that money will “trickle down”? If it was going to do so, it would have started long ago. Instead, jobs sent overseas and money hoarded (by $Trillions) in offshore accounts, not taxed, removed from our economy.
Gay rights? Does not take anything from anyone. Nobody is being forced to marry within their gender. It just expands rights for some while taking nothing away. Except state sanctioned hatred.
Women's rights? Again, nothing taken away, just expansion of rights. Increased safety in some cases. 
Immigrant's rights? What is lost? Sending people including children back to areas where it is highly likely their lives were in danger to begin with. You may open up jobs which pay less than you would be willing to work for and still may be unwilling to do if the pay was raised.
Food stamps and welfare? The average American pays less than $80 per year on food stamps and welfare. Take them away and you force people into starvation, possibly homelessness.
Religious rights? Has anyone taken your Bible away? Bolted the door to your church? Filed criminal charges against you for observing your religion without invading the rights of others?
Peaceful agreement with Iran instead of war? No, it is not costing you anything. The money being given to them does not come from your pocket. It only releases funds which belong to Iran which have been frozen. The risk? The highest level of monitoring on the issue of any country in history by numerous countries.
The fact is, the economy has improved, unemployment is down, the deficit is expected to be eliminated by 2017 (barring GOP obstructionism). The deficit must be dealt with before we can touch the national debt. More Americans have greater equal rights than ever in history. More Americans have access to regular healthcare than in decades, possibly ever. No more being denied insurance because of existing conditions. Our dependence on foreign oil is the lowest in at least 40 years. The environment is beginning to show improvement. (But a long way to go.) 
The right wing response? With every single improvement, they get more and more angry. There can be no rational conclusion except sadism. A large group of people who enjoy taking active part in causing emotional and physical harm to other human beings. Maybe you have not admitted it to yourself. Look in the mirror, face yourself. Admit it. Your religion does not endorse this behavior. Most of the civilized world and our society does not endorse your behavior. If you say it out loud, how many people do you think would support it and how many would walk away? Admit it. You enjoy the idea of people starving, homeless, shot to death. 

I know what to expect if I post this. Hateful remarks explicitly proving my point. Have at it. When you do so, you must by necessity, admit I am right.

Did not sleep well last night. Kept waking up. That's not always a bad thing. Sometimes, oddly, I do my most insightful thinking when I am really tired. 

Weather is getting colder. So now I have the problem of the bike being very stubborn about starting. During winter, I have to use an external heat source to get it started. Though, now that I have the ramp I could be the really strange neighbor for a while and roll the bike right into the house until I get a better engine warmer than the old one I had, which didn't really do much for the whole engine and kept falling off.

Another car

Went and got another car this evening. Slightly newer, slightly larger. It's a '97 Saturn S Series wagon. Needs a little work but seems pretty solid. Vibrates a bit because it needs a new motor mount but it's an easy one to get to, at the top. May need a new battery. I also got it for less than a down payment on a commercial used car. 

I've decided to keep going this route. Even if I have to get another used car every couple of years, it still costs less than having a monthly payment and/or some massive down payment. This is more secure. If I run into any financial problems, nobody is threatening to repossess my vehicle because I can't afford the payment. I'm also not juggling other bills to avoid exactly that problem. Instead, I can put money into savings.

Speaking of which, I have money I can put back in the bank and maintain some of my savings which allowed me to buy this car. I will check this car over real well first and find out what parts are apparent I need at the moment. Check the oil, transmission fluid. I already think new headlights may be a good idea. It may need a battery but not entirely sure yet. Need to change the insurance and get plates for it. 

In the end, this car isn't great but it drives. Looked up specs and it seems to have a good maintenance record for the series and gets over 30 mpg highway. So, for the price I'm not complaining. It is also large enough that I can carry some home improvement supplies in it which would not fit in the Mazda. I may check and see if it will pull a small trailer. Probably not. 

I am happy I didn't have to take off from work to get the car. I probably broke some kind of record going to the bank to cask a check today. From the time I left the house, rode the bike to the bank, got through the drive-through, cashed the check and got home took only 9 minutes! I did write the check out before leaving home, so only had to hand them the check and my ID. 

I did give the guy who sold me the car and extra $20 to help me get it home. He lived pretty close, so he followed me in his car. Then gave me a ride back to his house, where I picked up the scooter to ride it home. He was nice. 

One thing I am happy about may sound a little silly. Winter is coming and last year daughter loved it when we took a drive a couple of times to the mountains to go sledding. Though I think she may have enjoyed the ride more than the sledding. In any case, we should be able to do that again. Plus go to the corn maze this weekend. 

Some productivity

I did get some things done today. Cleaning, laundry, organizing. Still a long way to go to have the house truly organized but a little better tonight. 

So, starting tomorrow I may have a busy week ahead. During lunch, have to cash a check. After work, have to make calls and go test drive some vehicles. Once I choose a vehicle, I will have to get it towed home. Then there's the issue of registration. I may go slightly illegal for a short while, put the plate from the car on whatever vehicle I buy until I can do formal registration. Can switch the insurance easily. Email will do it. I am out of ink, though. Can carry the old papers until the new ones arrive. In the low chance I got pulled over they could quickly confirm it by computer. 

I am going to focus the search first and foremost on a larger vehicle. Something big enough to haul building equipment. It has been difficult to haul some things in this car, no matter how I like the car.

Been looking back over my strange medical history. Not like any person I have ever known. I once thought I had bronchitis, shoulder problems, knee problems and mood problems. It has turned out every single one of those issues was secondary to having an autoimmune disorder and not knowing it. Now, for years I have functioned under the belief I had Celiac disease and it turns out I probably don't. (The jury is still out for the moment but seems likely.) 

Like I said, nobody I have ever encountered has had such a strange medical history. Even with 20 years of nursing. Nobody I have known has ever reached my age before learning of ulcerative colitis. My symptoms were there but not severe. In some sense that's good. In others, really not good because of the advanced level of damage I encountered. 

However, here is the ultimate to all of this, which I just realized this evening. If I have ulcerative colitis and not Celiac, it means there is the possibility for a lot of my intestines to heal, which they would not do with Celiac. Still a lot of scar tissue but over time, it means if I keep it under control, my nutritional absorption will improve. I had come to the acceptance that that would never happen. 

It's a nice change of thought.

Marijuana madness/Feel the Bern!

I've been quite open about being on the medical cannabis program. I can honestly say it is definitely helping me. I sleep so much better and suffer less muscle spasms than before. Some muscle spasms I was not even aware I was having until they stopped happening.

Between that and other steps, my ulcerative colitis has very much improved. Took a long while for me to figure out the correlation between peppers and that condition because peppers have been a constant in my diet most of my life. It was only when I reduced and eventually removed them that it became apparent. Yes, that seriously sucks because I love spicy foods. 

I am also becoming active in promoting the legalization of cannabis as more information comes out about it. That is only happening because of gradually loosening restrictions on that use, so more research is being done. Note that because of the federal classification as a class 1 controlled substance, most research is not being done particularly professionally in this country. Most serious research is being done in other countries. Just another right wing fanatic belief doing damage to this country. 

However, many people have gone overboard with it. Meetings, conventions, a growing array of books and paraphernalia, etc. Some people are centering a huge portion of their lives around cannabis. I can't see myself doing this. It's a medication. Possibly a medication with multiple uses but still a medication. I have never worshiped any medication in the past and am not going to start with this one. The only good part I find in this is that many cannabis users are very Liberal, so I find more and more people I find things in common with. Though some have little they are interested in discussing when you move beyond cannabis. Sorry, can't form friendships or any form of relationships (aside from professional) based on a substance. Takes a lot more than that for me.

I will say this is one subject of many which is having a positive political effect. Historically, Liberals have been the least likely people to vote. Which is why we are in the social and political situation we are in today. Lately, in this election cycle, Liberals are finally becoming more active and vocal. I've been waiting for this my whole life. This is forward social evolution. 

One of the biggest things happening is the Bernie Sanders campaign. He is the most Liberal candidate I can recall ever running for office in my lifetime. I have donated money to his campaign several times now. I intend to volunteer to physically work on his campaign next year. Even if he does not win the nomination (which does look more likely every day) he has changed the discourse of this campaign just by his very presence in the campaign. Not only for this election cycle but for many election cycles to come. He raises questions and concepts which have people talking in terms they have rarely if ever talked about before in this country on a large scale. He is a definite game changer. 

I don't think his message would have been heard so loudly at any previous time. His campaign is timed perfectly as the complete opposite of the far right wing rhetoric which promotes hatred, bigotry on many levels, suppression of the rights of many, social and personal apathy and policies which benefit the rich at the expense of the poor. While Bernie promotes inclusion, community, more fair distribution of wealth, equalization of rights and diplomacy above warfare.  

I am very much enjoying watching the Tea Bagger party implode on a near daily basis now. Every time one of them opens their mouths, they show their hypocrisy more. They go further and further off the rails and show nothing short of lunacy. In the process, they keep losing more and more of their own base. Moderate Republicans do not want to be associated with this level of damaging sentiment. The good part is that they began their campaigns so early. This has given more time for the falseness of their policies to be clearly displayed. You can only run a campaign based on hate for just so long before people start wanting more substance and clear answers. The more they provide answers, the more they turn people away. The fact that some of them have made the news so much has also given people time to get fatigued. Name recognition will only take you so far before people look closer at the picture and see the flaws. 

In the end, the only ones who will continue supporting the GOP will be those who gain the most financial benefit, those whose entire existence revolves around hatred/bigotry and those who make the conscious choice to remain brainwashed by right wing media. 

I am expecting the biggest Democratic landslide election in history next year.

Blown transmission

Got the new battery the other day, put it in the car. Took it for a short test drive. Later, took the dog for a walk. That's when I noticed a streak of fluid on the road, leading right to my driveway.

Had too much going on and/or was too tired to mess with the car until today. Checked the fluid levels and found there was no transmission fluid left in the car. Started the engine, put fluid in the transmission.. Every bit of it leaked out from between the engine and transmission. Meaning it blew a seal.

Considering I was having problems with it before this, it's pointless to do the work to replace the seal without replacing the transmission. Not an option right now. I did send out a few inquiries about price but figure at least $3000 to have someone else do the work. Can get a rebuilt for about $2000, which I could manage, however it would take all my accessible savings plus require a whole lot of work which I am not prepared to do at the moment, just before the holidays. I do want to fix this carve cause I really like this car. 

My best bet right now is get another used car. Can't do it this weekend because I can't get that much from the ATM. On the up side, there are a lot of decent cars for sale on CL for less than the transmission would cost. An extra vehicle would help haul parts and necessary tools to fix this car. Have to run around this week and see what I can get.

This week, I have tried eating gluten several times. No apparent direct negative effects. So, it seems I do not have Celiac after all! Yay! 

That does not mean I can eat whatever. I still have a LOT of dietary restrictions. Red meat, especially beef, eggs, soy and all peppers. The soy is the hardest to avoid but peppers suck on the personal level most. Guess I am doomed to a life of bland food from here on out. Also have to avoid many commercial cakes. 

Oh, well. Very happy I can eat wheat, after all. Reason I never figured it out before is that so many other things I  cannot eat are usually combined with bread. I will still eat gluten free pasta because it does not use eggs. Regular pasta does and that is what I was reacting to. Or mayo on sandwiches, peppers, red meat... In the end, this does expand my dietary choices, long as I eat wisely. 

I was pretty lazy today. Could have gone looking for a car if I had checked the car over earlier in the day. Last night I had really bad brain fog. Went to bed early, woke up late. Still felt lazy all day. Have a lot of things to do tomorrow to make up for it.

Emotionally exhausted

Today was a really bad day.

Woke up at 5 AM. Took over an hour to get back to sleep. Then had to get up a bit over an hour after that. 

For work, all day I was dealing with people who were more brain dead and/or obnoxious than usual. The whole day felt like it would never end.

After work, was going to ride to Los Lunas to the dispensary. Bike wouldn't start. Loose battery cable and the battery died. By the time it was charged up, dispensary was closed.

The new car battery was charged up, so I put it in the car. Started well. Took a short test drive. Then took the dog for a walk. That's when I noticed the car had a puddle under it and had left a line of fluid all the way down the road. Not sure what kind of fluid just yet or where it came from. I just decided to leave it and figure it out later in the week. Not in the mood tonight.

I'm just going to sit back, watch TV, take my medicine and go to bed.

Though, on the other hand, one thing seems to be looking up. I have had questions for a while. The pathology on my colonoscopy last year did not say anything about being conclusive for Celiac Disease. So, last Thur I went and got two hamburgers. The next day, no negative effects. On Sunday, went and had fried chicken with daughter. Once again, no negative effects aside from a little gas. 

So, is it possible I do not have Celiac? The difference is this between now and previous attempts. I left out all mayonnaise and peppers. Ulcerative colitis means I cannot eat peppers, eggs (including mayo), milk products and very little red meat. So, those things are off the menu. However, if I can eat wheat products after all, that would be awesome! Historically, when I ate wheat products, I also ate a lot of those things. 

In the end, I am feeling better physically. My negative feelings today are all emotional.

I'm going to push things a little further. I'm going to go get some doughnuts. Just going to have them with almond milk and see how it works out.

Once again

The car broke down yet again yesterday afternoon, as daughter and I were going to the Balloon Fiesta. The car started acting strangely, very difficult to accelerate. Barely made it to the parking lot for Cottonwood Mall. We parked on the far side from the mall from the Park and Ride. Walked through the mall and hopped the bus. I was not going to break the promise to daughter to take her to the Balloon Fiesta unless it simply could not be done.

After we came back, tried the car and it wouldn't start. So, we got towed again. Twice in two days.

I did not expect this to happen, since the battery seemed to hold a charge yesterday. 

This morning I charged the battery. Soon as the charger indicated full charge, I tried starting the car. It clicked but would not start. The battery was no longer holding the charge. Oh, well.

So, have to get a new battery tomorrow. Then have to figure out if I can do anything about the transmission.

I was seriously angry at the Park and Ride for the Albuquerque Balloon Fiesta. First, as the attendance keeps increasing, they eliminated Park and Ride Service to the South Valley. Then, their website said buses would keep running until everyone was gone. However, after tickets were purchased and before we got on the bus, we were told we could not miss the 9:30 bus. Everyone was told the same thing. So, when it was time to leave the line reached nearly back to the grass (a considerable distance), causing foot traffic problems which could not be avoided. I am sure many people would have stayed longer and spent more money if they were not afraid of being stuck with no way back to their cars. If this happened every day of the Fiesta, there is a good chance that tens of thousands of dollars were lost in revenue. However, in the end I can just call it normal Albuquerque planning. 

Nothing ever goes as planned

Nothing I planned yesterday went the way I planned it.

Picked daughter up after work. Took longer to get there than usual because of traffic. 

We were going to the Balloon Fiesta. Got to the Park and Ride. It was already closed. Normal Albuquerque event planning. The outgoing Park and Ride buses stop at 6:30, too early for many of us who work for a living to make it. I know the traffic getting into the park and knew at that point there would be no chance of parking before the evening events began. So, we deferred until today.

I also had an issue with the car acting strange. We went to eat dinner. When we went to leave, the car wouldn't start. Got a jump start from someone, still no luck. Finally called a tow truck. At that time of evening, it cost $100 for the tow. 

However, I think that may have been karma. The tow truck owner is the same guy I have used across different companies for years. He is struggling and has problems with his truck. He apologized for charging me so much. I told him not to apologize. He has no partners and works his business alone, 24/7. 

Once I got the car home, cleaned the battery posts and charged the battery, it started. 

Then I tried starting the bike to keep the battery up. It was dead, too. Have it on the charger now. 

Strange how things run in specific patterns for me like that.

Oh, well. I finally made the new seat cover for the bike this week. Not all that attractive but does look better and is more comfortable than the old, worn out one. 

In a minute

Have not gotten much done yet today. Get moving in a minute. It's cloudy but comfortable outside. Going to split efforts between inside and outside.

I have a lot to do but have not really set priorities. Kind of hard to do because so much overlaps. So, my first priority needs to be more organizing and cleaning. I do finally have things to a point where that will not be a tremendous job. Not small but so large as to be intimidating. 

I've fallen down on the job with the tomato plants. I now have more rotten tomatoes on the vines than good ones. Need to pick a bunch of them and take them to the homeless shelter this week. Today would be a good day to pick them.

Cucumbers were taken over by insects. No more cucumbers remaining. Got eaten up before they grew. Glad I got a few jars out of it this year. I'll make a bigger effort on some things next year.

I do have several pumpkins growing now, some of which are getting to a decent size. I'll cut the vines and let some of them ripen in a couple of weeks. 

Not seeing carrots or lettuce coming up yet but temperatures are now at the point for them to germinate. Still some hope. 

More political activism

I'm guessing I have some minor illness going on. Slept last night for 9 hours. My average is 7. Not feeling as achy but just easily fatigued. I think I should be back to full speed tomorrow.

That's okay. It was rainy and windy a good part of the day. So, I stuck with regular domestic stuff around the house today.

Other than that, I hung around online and got politically active again. In most cases, I kept it all rational and educational. Not the kind of education a lot of people want to have but that kind of person is precisely my largest target audience. Some of my writing has veered further into the psychological arena.

Here are some of the things I wrote today:

The more we focus on mass shootings and violence in this country, the more we truly need to focus on the sources of these things in our own society.
Let me be clear that I am focusing on American society because issues do change from one society to another and one culture to another. This is only one issue but is a major one.
When you examine the root source of many issues of violence in our country, one common thread comes into play. Emotional repression. 
Emotional repression has most commonly been a male issue. However, as we have seen from the last few decades, it is a growing issue for females as well. That is because of equal rights. I will stick mostly to the male perspective because, well, I am a male and most associated with that aspect. Though I fully recognize the growing female component.
Historically and even into today, male children are raised with the perspective that male children should learn to suppress their emotions. Males are told throughout our lives to “suck it up”, “be a man”, “man up”. We witness daily people who are overly aggressive, even violent being rewarded for this behavior and referred to as “real men”. 
The actual truth behind much of this is that suppressing your emotions takes a medically and psychologically measurable burden on any person. This takes the form of increased stress, leading to such things as alcoholism, drug abuse, high blood pressure, depression, suicide, criminal tendencies, aggression, stroke and homicide. Even cancer has been proven to have definitive links to stress level.
Historically, these have been areas which men were more prone to these effects. In recent decades, women have been seeing an increase in every one of these areas.
So, it is obvious that a strong percentage of this comes down to personal responsibility. Though before that can happen, the individual needs to recognize the problem. That is hard to do in a society which praises people who are aggressive as leaders, refers to compassionate leaders as weak and at the personal level punishes us when we express negative emotions. Nobody is positive all the time. We have stopped treating each other like human beings.
Even the methods, however harmful, we once had are daily being stripped away. Alcohol was once the method many people used for dealing with stress. Alcohol came under fire and medications took their place. Now excessive medications have come under fire. 
In no way do I defend chemical repression of emotions. Yet will not claim I have never been prone to exactly that in my younger days.
What can we, as a society, expect to happen when we tell people to keep their emotions inside? Both positive and negative? What happens is those emotions become bottled, pressure builds. There can be only one result after enough pressure builds. The vessel either implodes or explodes. 
Every single one of this plays a part in this cycle. We either act as release valves for one another or we increase that pressure. Every time you belittle or invalidate the emotions of another person,you build that pressure. Every time you treat another person like they are invisible, you build that pressure. 
In the end, it does not tend to take much to disperse that pressure. Depends on the person and just how much pressure has built up. The first step is simply treating other people with respect. When you have time, listen. And stop treating people like they are flawed when they have some moment of weakness. Even if they are chronically weak, what is really wrong with that? Not all of us have the same level of strength. Just accept people for who they are. Doesn't mean you have to adopt them. Just accept them. In the process, you could play a large part in preventing yet another tragedy.

No, that will not fix all our problems. But it is a really good start.

Here is another:

I have tried putting this nicely but for some people that just does not work. 
So, let's try a different tack.
The people who hoard guns really do so for their personal safety. However, no matter how many guns they amass, they never feel safe. 
There is a very good reason for this. The thing they truly fear is not outside. It is inside. 
They want to feel important. Yet fear they are not.
There is no foreign army breaking down your door. Obama is not coming for your guns. 
They go to sleep each night in their home filled with weapons, yet still afraid. Their sleep is broken, their dreams turn to nightmares of people attacking them and invading their homes.
Most have security systems, yet are still afraid.
They surround themselves with like-minded people, yet are still afraid. 
What are they afraid of? Someone not seeing them as masculine enough? Being irrelevant? Being invisible to those around them?  
One thing wrong with surrounding yourself with people who think the same way is that, together you do not feel more secure. Instead, the number of fears grows. Fear of women is added to by fear of Black people, then Hispanics, then gay people, then Muslims on the other side of the planet and the list goes on and on and on....
This is NOT an attack. This is meant to make some people reflect on this. 
Buying another gun is not going to make you feel secure. Attacking the rights of other Americans will not make you feel secure or more important for more than a few seconds. There will always be something more, something different to fear. Always. 
The truth is, the more people you alienate, the more your fear becomes justified. 
It's true, nobody on earth will always have some level of danger. Look at Gandhi, look at Lennon, look at Bruce Lee. 
So in the end, it all comes back to FDR. “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”
The call is your own. When you live in fear and allow it to rule every minute of your life, you lose. There may be no immediate enemy yet you lose. You lose seeing the diversity of life. You lose making friends with people whom you can learn a lot from, who do not expand on your fears but on your joys. 
Fear is a hard thing to let go of. Ask anyone who has ever been in a hospital and was afraid to leave. Ask Holocaust victims. Ask former hostages. Ask veterans with PTSD. It is difficult but it can be done. But more guns are not going to help. The only thing you can do is admit that fear to yourself. Look around you at what you are really afraid of. How many times has your home been invaded? How many of rights really been taken away? Aside from the guns, if the government or anyone else looked at your life, what negatives would they find? Do you ignore or abuse your family, friends, co-workers or others only because of your fear? Once you admit it to yourself and realize there is no immediate basis for that fear, open up to your family and friends. Let them help you overcome it. 

And stop attacking people. It does not help you, it does not help them, it in no way improves anyone's life. Turn off Fox News which only shoves things in your face which heightens your fear, no matter how baseless it is. Go volunteer actual time and effort at a homeless shelter or domestic violence center. Take a look in the eyes of people who have real things to fear. It will change your life. You may even wind up selling some of your guns to help them.

And last: 

Here are the problems with tax breaks for the ultra-rich.
I will leave some aspects of this out for the sake of simplicity.
First, we have been trying this approach for at least the last 35 years. Which is how we have gotten to where we are now. But let's not focus on that. Let's go with very simple logic which has been learned from those 35 years. (Although it was predictable in the first place.)
Say a person makes $100 Million per year. That person gets taxed at 50 percent.
The result? They have $50 Million to live on. Not for their whole life. That is only for one year.
Ask yourself-Could you spend $50 Million a year?
Most of the ultra-rich actually do not. To use an arbitrary number, say they spend $20 Million. 
That leaves $30 Million in the bank. Collecting interest. Interest paid by you.
The next year, they make another $100 Million, same result. They now have $60 Million in savings.
What is the actual effect of this, especially if they keep that money in offshore accounts?
That money is now removed from the US economy. It does not create jobs, it does not pay wages, it is not loaned to small businesses. 
So, now you decrease the tax load on the rich to 20 percent.
Do they increase their cost of living? No. They still spend $20 Million per year. Which means they now have $80 Million per year, every year going into savings.
In ten years, that one single person has removed $800 Million from the US economy. Money they will never live long enough to spend. 
That would be fine if it was one person. However, multiply that by just 100 people.
Now you have $80 BILLION removed from the US economy in ten years. This has been happening for at least 30 years. So, a low ball estimate means in those 30 years the ultra-rich have removed at least 2.4 Trillion from the US economy. That is for only 100 people making ONLY $100 Million per year. The actual numbers are much, much higher because the same rules apply to corporations which make Billions every year, some of which pay no taxes at all.

Nobody has suggested all the wealth be taken from the rich. But I tend to think $50 Million a year is enough to live on. Especially when the same people are exporting jobs on a daily basis and claim the poor are the problem with the economy. 

So, yes, some of it is just re-wording of things I have written before. However, I will be quite honest and say that many of the people are either not very educated or are willfully ignorant. Getting through to them can be difficult. I'm not expecting any kind of magical transformation. Just planting the seeds of deeper introspection which may take years to sprout. I'm not even expecting to get through to everyone reading it. Some are nothing but sadists who take great joy in causing harm and pain to other living beings. Nothing will work on those people except ignoring them. Those are the ones who attack me for writing these things at all. So I block them to take away any joy they may take in the attempt to insult me. Though I also admit I toss out some very strong insults just before doing so. Those insults are distinctly tailored to their individual mentality and designed for maximum impact. Something I tend to be very good at. Usually used for good (and since I am trying to limit their harm, still is in a way) but can be used to inflict deep psychic wounds. I know it works at least part of the time because sadists do not tend to be very insightful, contrary to fiction. They are really just animalistic and not in any good sense. More like aggressive shit eating mongrels.

Emotional

I took half the day off from work yesterday, sick. Not sure if it was related to ulcerative colitis or a short-lived virus. Felt better today. 

Lately, I have to say I have been getting fairly emotional. Not a bad thing for me. I realize I can often be too levelheaded. But there have been a lot of events which warrant a strong emotional response. For the most part, I still manage to rationalize my outward responses. Inside is a different story. The reason I have that response is just to be able to function and encourage the response of others. 

There was another school shooting yesterday. 20 children killed. How does that NOT call for a response? The President was choked up when he made an announcement about it. The GOP response was truly deplorable. Jeb Bush said, "Stuff happens". Trump made an announcement supporting gun rights. No emotion whatsoever. 

I've been posting very emotional statements all evening. I think this was the final straw for most Americans. The gun rights nuts have had their way for far too long. Their statements never made sense in the first place but have been proven wrong consistently. Now there is finally a growing shout for stronger gun controls. People are disgusted. Me chief among them.