Took the ad down. Could see from the look in her eyes as soon as I saw her today that things were back where they were.
She's not seeing anyone else. I hate sounding like a drama queen. Just more fearful of losing this than any relationship in my life. If anyone else walked away from me, it would have hurt, especially in the last 30 years but I could handle it. This time is far different. I genuinely scares me how much I feel.
Definitely not going to sabotage it, consciously or subconsciously.
I think what happened was that she felt less attractive or like she was letting me down because she did not feel well. But seriously, it does not have to lead to the bedroom. I love the affection and I was missing that most of all. I felt for a while like she was here but not here.
Any way, tonight was wonderful. Lots of affection. Lots of talking. I needed that. Not the least bit ashamed of saying it.
I can take on the whole world in many ways. With her I feel different and need something else. I let the parts of me out that I always hid or that went unsatisfied. I do mean always. Once it is set free, then it becomes frightening to seal it back up. Not sure now how I could.
She's not seeing anyone else. I hate sounding like a drama queen. Just more fearful of losing this than any relationship in my life. If anyone else walked away from me, it would have hurt, especially in the last 30 years but I could handle it. This time is far different. I genuinely scares me how much I feel.
Definitely not going to sabotage it, consciously or subconsciously.
I think what happened was that she felt less attractive or like she was letting me down because she did not feel well. But seriously, it does not have to lead to the bedroom. I love the affection and I was missing that most of all. I felt for a while like she was here but not here.
Any way, tonight was wonderful. Lots of affection. Lots of talking. I needed that. Not the least bit ashamed of saying it.
I can take on the whole world in many ways. With her I feel different and need something else. I let the parts of me out that I always hid or that went unsatisfied. I do mean always. Once it is set free, then it becomes frightening to seal it back up. Not sure now how I could.
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