Today has been really bad emotionally for me.
I feel more isolated than I have in years.
GF said her leg is getting better. However, she plans on going to urgent care tomorrow. Would not go Fri or Sat. So I expect she will go late in the day.
I unfollowed her page for the time being. Too much of a separation for me from her views, which reflect the views of those who promote war. She says she is against war but refuses to listen. She continually posts things about Russiagate, Mueller and not trusting NK. Each of which will lead eventually to war. As long as anyone, any source is saying something against Trump, she will post it.
This evening we had a discussion about Winner, who was arrested for "leaking" classified information. I explained in detail why that person's claims were discredited. She posted it, any way. She was supposed to be looking up claims on RT or Sputnik with Russia bragging about interfering in the election. (She never found it.)
She says she loves my writing. That I have changed her mind on some issues. Yet it has changed nothing about her behavior. She doesn't discuss anything I write. There's no indication she has truly read it. I've gone into deep detail how Russia had nothing to gain by screwing with our election. Yet, long as it claims to implicate Trump, she believes it, no matter the cost.
I could, would and did rather ignore that to a degree but when added to feeling distanced physically and emotionally, it leaves me feeling more isolated. More alone.
I am going to be so happy when my neighbors move. At this point, I can NEVER walk out of my door, day or night, without someone being there. Usually walking in or out to buy pot. All I go out for is to smoke. No such thing as conversations with these people. So I wind up feeling like I am on stage on my own patio.
I have to TRY and break my writer's block tomorrow. That is making things worse. I have ideas and notes for articles. Two started. I have not been able to finish anything. Cannot focus well enough. My writing does take a lot of emotion and emotional effort. Whether it sounds like it or not.
I feel more isolated than I have in years.
GF said her leg is getting better. However, she plans on going to urgent care tomorrow. Would not go Fri or Sat. So I expect she will go late in the day.
I unfollowed her page for the time being. Too much of a separation for me from her views, which reflect the views of those who promote war. She says she is against war but refuses to listen. She continually posts things about Russiagate, Mueller and not trusting NK. Each of which will lead eventually to war. As long as anyone, any source is saying something against Trump, she will post it.
This evening we had a discussion about Winner, who was arrested for "leaking" classified information. I explained in detail why that person's claims were discredited. She posted it, any way. She was supposed to be looking up claims on RT or Sputnik with Russia bragging about interfering in the election. (She never found it.)
She says she loves my writing. That I have changed her mind on some issues. Yet it has changed nothing about her behavior. She doesn't discuss anything I write. There's no indication she has truly read it. I've gone into deep detail how Russia had nothing to gain by screwing with our election. Yet, long as it claims to implicate Trump, she believes it, no matter the cost.
I could, would and did rather ignore that to a degree but when added to feeling distanced physically and emotionally, it leaves me feeling more isolated. More alone.
I am going to be so happy when my neighbors move. At this point, I can NEVER walk out of my door, day or night, without someone being there. Usually walking in or out to buy pot. All I go out for is to smoke. No such thing as conversations with these people. So I wind up feeling like I am on stage on my own patio.
I have to TRY and break my writer's block tomorrow. That is making things worse. I have ideas and notes for articles. Two started. I have not been able to finish anything. Cannot focus well enough. My writing does take a lot of emotion and emotional effort. Whether it sounds like it or not.
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