Feeling melancholy tonight. Slight sore throat, not bad. Maybe allergies.
Christmas Eve.
Daughter is here. I played some Christmas music for a few hours this weekend. She enjoyed that. Suggested watching Christmas shows but she did not want to.
Cold front coming in tonight. Sadly, no snow. Christmas lights are on.
GF says she is in much the same situation. Watching Christmas movies alone. Says she has not been feeling well. Then she has been going to bed early every night.
So, while I can discuss things more openly, I'm alone for Christmas Eve weekend. Romantically, that is. I love my time with my daughter but it's just not the same as having someone romantically.
The discussion of whether gf will come over tomorrow afternoon went from a strong suggestion to "hope so". I'm completely expecting it to not happen. I have a feeling it will not happen. Maybe just anxiety.
In any case, I have no plans to be alone next Christmas Eve. I've spent enough years where I have been alone on Christmas Eve.
Who knows? Maybe I'm getting sick. Maybe going not into manic but depressive phase? (Don't think so.) I know I am sick of being alone. Not desperate by any means. But tired enough to act on not being alone all the time any more.
Christmas Eve.
Daughter is here. I played some Christmas music for a few hours this weekend. She enjoyed that. Suggested watching Christmas shows but she did not want to.
Cold front coming in tonight. Sadly, no snow. Christmas lights are on.
GF says she is in much the same situation. Watching Christmas movies alone. Says she has not been feeling well. Then she has been going to bed early every night.
So, while I can discuss things more openly, I'm alone for Christmas Eve weekend. Romantically, that is. I love my time with my daughter but it's just not the same as having someone romantically.
The discussion of whether gf will come over tomorrow afternoon went from a strong suggestion to "hope so". I'm completely expecting it to not happen. I have a feeling it will not happen. Maybe just anxiety.
In any case, I have no plans to be alone next Christmas Eve. I've spent enough years where I have been alone on Christmas Eve.
Who knows? Maybe I'm getting sick. Maybe going not into manic but depressive phase? (Don't think so.) I know I am sick of being alone. Not desperate by any means. But tired enough to act on not being alone all the time any more.
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