I told gf a couple of days ago that, when she is better medically, I need a Dom Day with her.
I have some specific fantasies involved with this. I will not recount them here, that's very private. While the physical expression of this is overtly sexual, the underlying truth is that it is an emotional issue. It is a bonding, a trust, an intensity beyond where we have gone. Beyond what I have done with anyone.
However, I get the feeling that is what she has resisted. Not saying it is a conscious resistance. I don't think it is conscious. I know she is not afraid of me physically. She knows I would not harm her. I think she fears the emotional intensity. She fears a closer bond than we have until it is made permanent by living together. We still have not had our ceremony. Yet we wear rings. The rings by definition are basically disposable. The ceremony is not. It runs deeper for both of us symbolically.
So fine, I can wait for the ceremony. However, the other part is something I want to happen sooner rather than later. This is important to me. It's an actual need for me.
Lately my libido has been at low tide, so that's not the issue here. But that does rise in tandem with my emotions, which have always been directly linked with my libido. Something my ex/es could never comprehend.
Have to get to work.
I have some specific fantasies involved with this. I will not recount them here, that's very private. While the physical expression of this is overtly sexual, the underlying truth is that it is an emotional issue. It is a bonding, a trust, an intensity beyond where we have gone. Beyond what I have done with anyone.
However, I get the feeling that is what she has resisted. Not saying it is a conscious resistance. I don't think it is conscious. I know she is not afraid of me physically. She knows I would not harm her. I think she fears the emotional intensity. She fears a closer bond than we have until it is made permanent by living together. We still have not had our ceremony. Yet we wear rings. The rings by definition are basically disposable. The ceremony is not. It runs deeper for both of us symbolically.
So fine, I can wait for the ceremony. However, the other part is something I want to happen sooner rather than later. This is important to me. It's an actual need for me.
Lately my libido has been at low tide, so that's not the issue here. But that does rise in tandem with my emotions, which have always been directly linked with my libido. Something my ex/es could never comprehend.
Have to get to work.
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